Strange Happenings

You know what's uncomfortable? Getting flashes of staggering wearily along an underground tunnel, barefoot, with blood (that is probably not yours) slicking your hands and arms nearly to your elbows. Off and on, for about a week. This happened several months ago. (I still need to cement the timeline, because I did not clearly write it down when it was happening. Stupid me.) It is the closest thing to a vision I've had in recent memory...and last week I finally asked my Tarot deck if it could tell me what led to that scene. (Sorry, no photo of the spread. Six cards in the first row, and one in the second, is correct.)

Queen of Cups	3 of Cups	King of Swords	The Fool	The Tower	The Magician
Justice

I am operating under the assumption that part of me was doing things my waking mind was not aware of. So, after staring at the cards for a few minutes without writing any analysis, I wondered...did the deck just tell me I met some people while traipsing through the Otherworlds, possibly imbibed some substances, and then did something disastrously stupid? Upon looking at this again, a second interpretation struck me: that I was being naive, but then something huge happened (not necessarily my doing), and I learned enough to become a fledgling Magician. The shocking event probably was the death of my step-grandpa, who I had not seen in over a decade. I did not say this before, but around that time I felt prodded by Hades & Persephone, so I sat down, arranged my altar to open a line to them, and asked what they wanted. The answer was muddled and disturbing. The one clear image/sensation I got, I am not sure I am at leave to share. I am still puzzling over its meaning. Anyway, a few days later I learned that Grandpa had died...possibly the day I was spurred to reach out to those gods.

A pattern: I feel drawn to a deity, so I read about them. Days, weeks, or months of this later, I seek them out directly. They usually have something -- one thing -- to tell me, and will repeat it until I internalize it. With Athena, it was: Learn, Make. Guan Yin: Don't hate yourself so much. Hekate: change your circumstances now, or die like this, miserable. And so far, from Hades & Persephone: someone you hold dear in memory is leaving your world.

A Tarot Reading

A reading done for Dusken, put here because I don't trust Tumblr's formatting.

Dusken asked about "confirming some findings." The cards ("Shadowscapes Tarot" by Stephanie Pui-Mun Law) and I came up with this answer:

1. The core of the issue: XV The Devil. Someone or something is draining you, keeping you chained. Escape may be near, but you are unable to see it at this time. (Note the key in the mouth of the mask above the woman's cell.)

2. What helps or hinders: 5 of Wands. A bunch of little problems have tumbled together to become a huge issue. Probably what's keeping you enslaved in The Devil Card.

3. The Foundation, or why you asked: Queen of Wands. A rightfully proud, confident, and artistic woman. Can be manipulative, but if that were the case, I think the card would be reversed. I am never 100% sure if the royal cards refer to people or their traits, but I'm getting a "person" vibe. Reminds me a bit of you, or at least how you project yourself over the Internet.

4. What has happened: 6 of Cups. Whatever this issue is, there is nostalgia attached to it. Possibly something from your childhood? Unfortunately, everything can't go back to the way it once was.

5. What may happen, or is happening: 6 of Wands. From the book that came with the deck: "The Six of Wands symbolized victory and triumph. Once has prevailed and overcome many obstacles to come out on top. But you must beware falling prey to hubris and lassitude that uncontested victory may bring, and not become lost in self-importance."
     To be honest, I've never liked this card. The man in it is...overconfident. What secrets does the shining hero hide in his heart? I feel that how he stands above the Devil Card (and the poor woman under its hooves) is significant. Maybe this is a person who is keeping you locked up? Someone who thinks they are acting righteously? I may be totally wrong.

6. What will happen: 7 of Pentacles. This one marks a choice: act now, or wait for conditions to improve -- but they may not.

7. How you see yourself: 2 of Pentacles. You are juggling many responsibilities at once. You're doing okay, for the moment, but the situation is precarious.


8. How others see you: 4 of Cups. Listless, bored. But you are not as alone as you think you are...and that is a good thing to be reminded of, especially in the depths of melancholy and self-pity.

9. What you must get through: 8 of Wands (reversed). Upright, this card could mean the start of a long journey. So, reversed, I interpret this to mean you are being held back, expending yourself with no visible progress. Think of the 5 of Wands from earlier. But it seems you won't be stuck forever.


10. The End Result: Knight of Pentacles. Finally, moving ahead! (I hope this means you'll be able to move away from your awful parents soon!) The Knight is rather stubborn and single-minded, but those are beneficial traits for his mission.

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Hopefully that helps!